A Story of Five OCategory: General   Jun 22nd 2012  06:12PM   1

I've been getting a number of requests from younger gents lately (as in under 50, my required minimum), and almost to a man they say something along the lines of, "I'm especially mature for my age and would truly enjoy the company of an older women..."

Well, bully for you, because after expressly stating I do not see younger men, I am not terribly concerned with what they enjoy. All due respect, assuming to understand the complex reasoning behind my requirement is not exactly "mature" and is exactly the type of youthful arrogance that make me want to avoid them in the first place. However, since it confounds so many of them, I shall try to clarify.

Maturity is not the issue (at least not in the way younger men perceive maturity). Sophistication is not the issue. Worldliness and life experience, while helpful, are also not at issue here. There are much deeper forces at play (from empathy, identity, dependency, ego needs, validation, connectedness, sensitivity, yin/yang, head, heart, sex, spirit, yada yada yada, and on and on and on...) that I simply don't have the space, time, or inclination to cover it all. 

I will say this. Compatibility means what I offer is what my date needs (and vice versa), and there's a significant difference in what people need in their 30s, 40s, and 50+. Furthermore, until a man has reached that age, he will not comprehend the needs of a man (or woman) that age, and it's presumptuous to think he does.

As our perception changes, what we need from our romantic partners changes too. It's a beautiful journey that simply cannot be fathomed beforehand, not any more than a child knows what it's like to be a teenager or a teenager can possibly know what he'll need at 30 (and so on). It's a mystery meant to be discovered in time, some of which comes from life experience but much of which needs the distance of time and reflection. I even think some of it is written in our DNA. 

You can't predict the future, change human nature, or subvert my requirements. And anyone who's old enough to date me doesn't need that explained to him. 

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